It’s kind of strange, ever since I started this blog over a year ago I’ve been on a few actual dates most notably:

1) took me his college campus. Did not call me back again.
2) took me to the zoo. Shallow man. Led me on for a whole week before telling me he was bored, shallow, and thought I was easy.

And then there’s this new guy. In all honesty I would not have been able to handle him without the others.

He’s a good guy, older, intelligent, handsome, kind. He has a few shortcomings and I was willing to look past them. We were both attracted by superficial means; he wanted to know me physically. I wanted to know him mentally.

I was warned. Multiple times, but I wanted to see how far he and I would push our mental limits.

There was no physical activity in our interactions. Only mental. He would allude to the physical nature of his personality and somehow I would divert it to protect myself per ce.

This lasted a week. There was no warning he would give up.

And as sad as I was regarding the last two, I feel little for this one. For one, I’m moving in a few months. Two, I’ve been through these steps before, he lost and I have won. Three, honestly if he can respect the boundary I put up and walk away before it’s too late he’s a good man, just not for me, yet.

I read an article that stated: “the older men get, they tend to look more for marriage.”

I’m nineteen, almost twenty. He’s twenty-four. Unless he meets this amazing girl who fits his current standards, he’s not going to settle down now.

And plus, its his decision, his life. Just like it was my decision, and my life.

Its sometimes mind boggling how much I’ve changed in the past year.

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