Everybody Bleeds the Same

A few years ago, I walked into a store and found a CD I fell in love with – Ferras

 

 

One of the songs, highlighted above really touched me. The words just emanated and suddenly it became a theory I lived by, “everybody bleeds the same” we all have the same hurts, we have the same fears, we have the same genetic make up.

 

I kind of accidentally forgot this artist, the CD was lost in an intercontinental move and my iPod never contained it. When my iPod broke and in total angst against Apple (I had lost all of my songs). I went through the hard drives of all of my computers and found the saved files of this artist.

 

This was the first song I heard, and then I remembered the significance of this artist. I also remembered where I got the phrase: “Everybody bleeds red blood” The Connest words of faith (from my story; the Connest are an elite militia). White on red became a significant factor in my novel and listening to the words: “We’re the same mistake, packaged differently.”

Dubstep violin

I needed a new album to rock out to because as much as I love and adore Kimbra, who I mention quite frequently, her album sounded lonely.

What better way than with a dubstep violin album made by Lindsey Stirling? Honestly, I love the violin, dubstep, not so much but it just sounds so wonderful and the fact she dances with a violin!

At current I’m working on a picture composition of one of her songs, I’ll probably forget to finish it or give up on it and refuse to show anybody about the forlorn project. So actually forget I mentioned it. 🙂

Instruments

I’ve never been a music guru. Being Asian, naturally my parents tried to keep me on one of the three instruments of the Asian world: piano, violin, and flute. I had the piano and I loved it but I was never musically talented, or actually patient. I wanted to immediately play Bach and Beethoven. Instead I got Mozarts small children’s tunes.

After five years of suffering, my parents gave me the reprieve and instantly I began to sing, the very thing they dreaded. I actually was born not to sing, but I convinced myself that I could. I’ll never be great though but I can hold a note and sing in a choir.

I then ventured over to Ocarina (yes, because of The Legend of Zelda) and Ukulele, because that’s where my home home home plays. I just traipsed about for ages trying to find an instrument that I’d love, even trying Trombone.

Watching a concert tonight I realize that I am not musical, and I’ll never have the patience or the drive to be so. I can appreciate it, but I’ll never subject somebody to suffer as I did.

In the meantime: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1yydcG9woWA

A cafe

Wandering outside the house, walking, musing. Admiring all the people gathered outside for festivities. Getting pushed around by people and becoming slightly claustro/agoraphobic.

Lovely days and lovely nights, finding myself in a beautiful little cafe while tasting Sweet Potato Soup and people watching as the sky falls and the winds pick up the cool air, sending chills into our world and many huddle together for warmth.

Blogging

When I first started blogging I just figured that I would silently document my life in memories as I always have. Like most bloggers I actually have a camera but a faux photography background; but when I opened up this page I decided to keep the details vague and leave the reader guessing. A mirror to my plight in discovering myself through the use of words. I figured, if it’s in my hands, in my room it’ll become a doodling pad and I would not write every day, if it was public, then perhaps maybe.

It’s much harder with a camera and photos to keep the reader guessing – it’s still hard with text as I want to over document my life as documenting delight does almost every day, lauding her love for her children. I opted to under document it and highlight with (changed) phrases what was eye-opening for the day, week.

I have to refuse to share where I am, my circumstances are different; I’m younger, less wise, more naive and I have nothing to show thus far. I’m not famous; lots of people do know me though through various means. I’m not talented; my work has not been prolific and established world wide. My writing style is nothing like the road is home.

But I’m finding that maybe it’s because of my youth, my confusion, my personal stories that I’m finding myself at peace with this project. It may not be everything that you want it to be for a blog, but just a way, a place where I can hide myself and show my true personality on a piece of paper (in this case on electronic script) and kind of truly be at peace with myself.

The two blogs listed above are the two that got me into blogging. I am inspired by them everyday and hope that one day I can learn to love as they do, to show my talents as they do. I read them religiously and hope and pray and hope and pray that my writings can touch the hearts of people as theirs do.

That said, I should go back to self-discovery starting with the first and most essential question: “who am I?”

Kimbra

I’ve mentioned before: I love Kimbra.

After listening for two whole weeks on YouTube, keeping my fingers poised over the replay button I finally decided to buy

    Vows

It’s amazing. I ended up dancing in my room for about two and a half hours while sobbing because the songs related to me and my adolescent life. I’m not much of a dancer but in the solitude of my room I let loose and let my body go free to her voice and her amazingness.